Do you hear what I hear?

If you were with me and my geekiness last year, you already know how I feel about Christmas. And if you weren't and you don't... well, it's my favourite time of year. For reals.

Which is slightly amusing because I hate the consumerism and the way people go nuts, spending money they don't have and treating everyone else in the malls and stores like they're garbage. If we could get rid of that, the season would be perfect.

But beyond that, this time of year just makes me so happy. It doesn't really matter how depressed I might be, the magic of Christmas is still there for me. It still astounds me that I haven't grown bitter towards the holiday, despite the bad things that have happened on it. In fact, I have every reason to hate it. My earliest memory of Christmastime is my birth mother being rushed away to the hospital by ambulance because she was getting far sicker. Ten years later, I had just lost my grandmother and spent Christmas watching my grandfather die. Three years later, it was on Christmas Eve that I attempted suicide for the first time. Yet strangely, none of that tainted any of my holiday cheer.

Maybe it's the surreal sensation everything causes. The beautiful lights strung on all the houses, making the snowfall look even more perfect; the way the inside of your house is decorated more than for any other time of year. How cheerful the music is. And yes, even though I know the truth about Santa Claus, there is still a part of me that can't help but want to believe in him.

Maybe it's because for that little bit of time, I can forget about reality and focus on doing what I love doing most -- loving on people and finding things to brighten their day. For me, my favourite part of Christmas has always been giving to others and seeing joy when they open what I've given them.

Is it sad that I haven't even made plans to move out yet, and already the thing I'm looking forward to the most is decorating my own place for Christmas?

What can I say. I've always been a strange one.

It hurts, but I'm giving up.

As many of you know, I'm an annual participant in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), and get all uber-excited as November approaches. After all, what better way to lead into Christmas-time than to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days amidst a bunch of other writers as crazy as you are?

The problem is that this year, I'm not having any fun. What's worse than that, it's actually stressing me out. This year is just so crazy busy that I don't have the time to write, when I do make the time I'm having to forego other things that need to get done, and my brain is so full of all the other things I have to do that writing even 500 words in one sitting causes me to want to rip my hair out in frustration. I'm so far behind on my word count that even with my Speedy Gonzales typing skills, I'm pretty sure I can't even catch up.

So after much back and forth and contemplation, I have decided to withdraw. It hurts, it hurts a lot, but I feel like I don't have any choice. Even though there is only a week and a half left, my gut is telling me that if I were to force myself to finish, I would likely end up ruining the passion that I have for NaNoWriMo. Thus, I think it best that I take the rest of November to just breathe, and catch up on everything in life that I have not had the time to do due to countless meetings, physiotherapy, boyfriend time (and the constant being on the road to have that time) and everything else.

If it's supposed to be about experiencing God, why does it sound like a bad infomercial?

As a Christian, I think it’s a great idea to go to Israel, to see where everything took place and learn more about the history of our faith and everything that goes with it.

Lately, they have been playing an advertisement on our Christian radio station for trips to Israel. I’m not against advertising it, not at all. But I find myself rather put off by this specific advertisement. The way the entire advertisement is presented, it sounds like it’s trying to play on Christians who feel like they are uncertain in their faith, or who doubt the presence of God; but more than that, it sounds like a commercial making a money grab by appealing to Christian’s emotional connections to their faith. Something which I have always firmly disagreed with in anything involving Christianity.

I know there is something magical and amazing about standing somewhere that history took place. I’m a history nut, so I know the sense of awe and undescribable feelings that come from going somewhere historical. In fact, I’m one of those really weird nuts, that has to touch the walls, and actually ‘feels’ the history coming to life.

But the way this commercial advertises, it sounds like it’s trying to tell you that only by visiting Israel will you be a stronger Christian in your faith with an increased connection to God.

One of the opening lines, is a man who sounds like he’s on a tv infomercial saying ‘What makes Jesus’ miracles even more miraculous? Experiencing them where they took place.”

Uhm, what now? I’m sorry, but the ONLY thing that could make Jesus’ miracles more miraculous would be by actually watching them take place. I’ll admit, standing where they happened would be pretty amazing. It would definitely be surreal and awesome. But a miracle can’t be more miraculous than it was. It’s not something that becomes ‘more’ in time.  In fact, the ONLY thing that could make it more miraculous would be actually witnessing them as they happened. So unless Israel has suddenly figured out the trick to time travel, it’s not going to increase their level of ‘miracle’.

Later, the man tells you that you will ‘sense God’s presence like you’ve never felt it before’. This line I think, is what bugs me the most out of the entire commercial. As I said earlier, I think it’s a great idea to visit Israel, especially because I do believe that by going there, the reality of everything that happened will sink in a little bit more. But its not something that should define one’s faith. The way this line is spoken, it’s like they are suggesting that the only way you can experience God in His fullness is by visiting Israel, and that if you haven’t (or don’t) there is a part of His presence you will never discover.

Now, I get that Israel is the promised land, and that the Israelites are God’s chosen people, but, didn’t Christ die so that we could ALL have that relationship the Israelites have with Him? And even if, as His chosen people, their bond is stronger than the one we have, visiting Israel won’t make our bond stronger. It won’t suddenly make us ‘Israelite by association’ or give us a connection with God that we haven’t had before.

For some, maybe it will… maybe that is the way God intends to really boot up their faith, but that’s not everyone. God has a different path chosen for everyone on how they grow in their faith and how He makes His connection with them.

So now, you have an advertisement playing on that. And see, as a Christian, you are always desiring to get closer to God, to strengthen that connection. What happens to the people who allow their emotions to be pulled by this commercial, go for it, and then find when they leave that this visit did not increase the strength of their relationship with God, that this wasn’t where God intended to flood them with His presence. Chances are, they are going to start questioning and doubting a lot. Questions like ‘Why didn’t God connect with me there, when he does with everyone else?' and all those little things that eat at you will start to rise up.

All because of a commercial that makes promises it can’t fulfill.

I don’t know. Maybe I’m the only one who feels that way about it. I don’t doubt that visiting Israel would be a powerful experience that would certainly contain aspects that would help to strengthen your faith, and even help you find a way to get closer to God. It’s something to connect on. I just don’t think those kinds of promises are what should be used to convince people to go.

Smells like the 90's - KROD, The Anniversary Edition

If you're one of my newest followers and thus have not been around for KROD, well... you don't know what you've been missing! KROD is the Karoke Ring of Death and was started one year ago by an awesome group of bloggers.

This month, in honour of our One Year Anniversary, we're going back to the beginning with 90s songs. If you want to see me singing Green Day, hope on over to Liz's blog at Landscapes of Me . Awesomely enough, Liz is also a geek, which kind of makes things fit nicely.

I get the incredible honour/pleasure/ joy of hosting Alexandra from The Tsarista Says. She is by far one of the coolest people I have ever encountered (yeah, yeah, I say that about ALL 20sb peeps I'm friends with, but it's TRUE!). This girl is amazing. She's kind of like a celebrity. Which means I'm hosting a celebrity. At least, I think she's a celebrity. But anyways, enough about my thoughts... I'd like you all to meet, The Tsarista!!!

Hello folks, Alexandra of the Tsaritsa sez here. Major props to Tabs for hosting me and being so awesome about it. I hope you enjoy my video for this month's theme of "Songs from the 90s." I chose to do "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana because I love Kurt Cobain (Ben and I dressed as Kurt and Courtney for Halloween this year), and this song pretty much redefined my generation. My dancing is kind of lame and I don't know what I was doing with the chair in that one part, but there's plenty of jumping around as usual. When you're done watching me act a fool, stop on over to my blog and check out Jes singing one of the best songs from my childhood, "Barbie Girl" by Aqua. Who didn't love that song? Man I rocked that cassette til it popped.

Je me souviens.

Photo Copyright Tabitha Venasse 2006

In Flanders fields the poppies blow     

 Between the crosses, row on row,

   That mark our place; and in the sky

   The larks, still bravely singing, fly

Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,

   Loved and were loved, and now we lie,

         In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:

To you from failing hands we throw

   The torch; be yours to hold it high.

   If ye break faith with us who die

We shall not sleep, though poppies grow

         In Flanders fields.

     ---- Col. John McCrae

Oh, the things you find on an external hard drive...

So earlier tonight I was digging through my hard drive to find some files from a volunteer job, when I decided to browse through all my college photos. I had forgotten that I had posed as a 'model' for a friend in photography a few times... I wasn't *totally* bad at it... some of the photos were actually pretty decent!

Of course, they're all still pretty pathetic attempts on my part, but I thought I would share some of the better ones with you anyways as I reminisce about college.

... Man. Am I really old enough to reminisce about college? *sigh*

But also... YAY!!! I reached 100 followers :) Thanks to my last several followers, you all have made me feel special!

Photo credit Curtis Peters

Photo Credit Curtis Peters

Photo Credit Curtis Peters

Photo Credit Curtis Peters

Photo Credit Curtis Peters

Photo Credit Amy Medlock

Remember..

Remember the men and women who gave up all they had and died with nothing, so that we could have everything.

Remember the men and women who fought not because they believed in the war, but because they had no choice.

Remember the men and women, who did what they did for their families and the future of their children, to ensure their freedom of faith and life.

Remember the innocent who paid for the crimes of the greedy and powerful.

Remember the civilians who were bombed by governments who didn’t want to play by the rules of engagement.

Remember the young boys who were coaxed with a romantasized view of the war, only to discover how false that lie was.

Remember, remember, because once we forget, the lives that were lost become meaningless, and those of us moving forward will likely make the same mistakes again.

Remember how millions of people suffered because of fear of standing up against someone so evil that the whole world felt his impact.

Remember, because it is the least we can do to honour those who stood for us.

11/11/11.

I’ll be remembering. How about you?

Remembering those who fought for our freedom is not about a fashion statement.

I don't know about the rest of you, but Remembrance Day is big deal in my eyes. Whether or not you agree with the wars, or the idea of sending our men and women out to fight, the fact remains that hundreds of thousands of men and women have died over the years to ensure that we keep our freedom, and often in an attempt to secure freedom for those who do not have it. 

Every year, I wear my poppy proudly to remember not just those who died for our freedom, but those who died for fighting wars they shouldn't have had to fight. For those whose families were threatened if they did not join the war, who fought less out of agreement and more out of a lack of choice.

Poppies are important because they are a public declaration that you are choosing to honour all of those fallen men and women.

But I can't help but find it offensive when people wear poppies in ways that are clearly more about a fashion statement and less about the reason they should be worn.

Wearing the poppy over your heart is a symbol of keeping those fallen close to your heart. Of the love, sorrow and thankfulness that goes out to those men and women.

But then, you have the people who feel that wearing a poppy over your heart isn't good enough. Because, you know, goodness forbid that it doesn't quite go with the outfit that you're wearing, or you don't like the idea of wearing a brooch-like item. Instead, they wear them like earrings, or weave them together as a necklace or a bracelet.

Or what about the people who try to wear as many poppies as they can, trying to 'out-remember' everyone else?

The point of the poppy isn't to make a fashion statement. It's not meant to make you look stylish. Wearing more poppies does not symbolize remembering more; if anything, it almost makes it into a joke. 

And so, dear wearers of the poppies, this year, I am begging you -- do away with the need to impress, and instead wear the poppy for exactly what it symbolizes. Don't cheapen what it stands for by having to make it 'better suit you'.

Sincerely, an aggravated supporter of Remembrance Day.

</end rant>